It’s no secret I struggle with body image probably as much as the next woman. There are parts of body that I am insecure about, especially my belly. There, I said it. My most self-conscious part of my body is my belly. If someone tries to touch it or rub it (CRIPES I am not a freaking genie lamp that needs rubbed), they will usually not get their hand back. And I have recently gained weight back and where is it all at; in the belly of course.
I have been fighting my body for a long time. I have hated it. I have cursed it. I have abused it. I have never really tried to love my body.
Yes, I understand the mass media in our society plays a cruel trick on everyone of us with unrealistic body images followed by commercials that talk about adding a fourth meal to the day. Mass media is a bitch!
Right now in my life, I am trying to become more present and awake in my daily life through meditation, gratitude and play. After tonight’s meditation I decided to read Ohso, an Indian spiritual teacher. And the page I opened to I had read and highlighted before just jumped out at me tonight. The passage was the following:
“So when changes start happening in the body, watch them and rejoice. Be more alert and more changes will happen. Be more conscious and you see that even the body starts having a consciousness of its own. And as you are becoming more alert and more aware, you will feel more loving toward your body, more compassionate toward your body, you will feel more close and more intimate, a kind of new friendship arising. Up to now you have simply used it. You have never said thank-you to your body, and it has been serving you in every possible way. So it is a good experience. Let it become more intense and help it. And the only way to help is to become more alert.” –Osho
Osho’s words inspired me to write a Thank-you note to my body. The thank you note turned out more poetic than I expected and centered around the death of my Aunt.
Thank You Body
Thank you body for the honor to sit by the side of Aunt Denise as she was dying.
Thank you body for the honor to feel her hands and face as she was dying.
Thank you body for the honor to see her as she was dying.
Thank you body for the honor to hear her moans as she was dying.
Thank you body for the honor to sit with her children as she was dying.
Thank you body for the honor to taste the delicious foods people shared with us as she was dying.
Thank you body for the honor to the feel the hugs I gave her as she was dying.
Thank you body for the honor to cry the tears I needed to as she was dying.
Thank you body for allowing me to laugh with my family about memories of our precious one as she was dying.
Thank you body for the privilege and honor to be by her side during this last part of her journey as she was dying.
Thank you body for allowing me to be fully present at her bedside as she was dying.
Thank you body for feeling the last kiss I gave her on cheek after her soul was gone.
Thank you body for allowing me to feel the grief of losing her yet still granting me breath.
Thank you body for keeping the memory of her in my heart always.
In Memory of Aunt Denise Belcher